A confession, or, "what is the title of the third book?"

I am a librarian. You know this already. I am a children's librarian. This, also, should not come as a surprise. However, what I am about to say may cause a few gasps and jaw-drops from the audience. I...have not...read...any Harry Potter books. It's true. I'm ashamed to say it. I feel as though I have neglected one of the most important duties of my career by skipping over this all-too-popular series.

Now it's not because I am not interested. In fact, I am very interested, especially considering the recent excitement over the fate of our beloved Harry. Plus, I love the movies! It's just a matter of the fact that I've always had other things on my nightstand and I'm not good at reading more than one book at once. I know once I start reading them I won't be able to put them down and starting a series of books, each volume containing around 700 pages, is a little overwhelming to consider.

We received our copies at the library today. They might as well be guarded by heavy artillery, armed guards and trip wires. I joke, but the publisher doesn't joke around. No one is supposed to get a peak at the highly coveted titles until midnight tonight. Internet leaks notwitstanding.

There has also been a certain electricity in the air at the library surrounding this larger than life event. One of my co-workers (one of the collection development librarians) spoke about the Harry Potter craze, "when I hear people say 'this is the biggest book of this year' I can't help but laugh and say 'year?! How about the last 15 years!'" And it's true, no other series or single title can come close to surpassing in widespread popularity of HP.

Everyone is shocked when I tell them I haven't read the series. Then they all say, "you need to listen to them." The books on CDs are read by Jim Dale, who is a phenomenal narrator. I highly recommend him and any of his work.

I swear I'm going to go check out the first one...even though I don't know the title...probably after I finish the book I'm on...and maybe after the next 15 I have checked out. Oh nuts. I'll get to it eventually.

Your Linguistic Profile:

75% General American English 15% Dixie 5% Upper Midwestern 0% Midwestern 0% Yankee

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

The oatmeal joke = lame

So...here it is. In all its glory.

A bowl of oatmeal walks into a bar and sits down to order. The bartender comes up to the bowl of oatmeal and asks "what would you like today?" The bowl of oatmeal says "I'd like a bowl of oatmeal please." The bartender says, "I'm sorry, we don't serve oatmeal here."

I thought the double meaning of the joke was absolutely hilarious. So weird.

The whole fam damily

Announcing

Please welcome the newest member of my little family. Her name is Lyra. She is a yellow lab, german shepherd mix. She looks a lot like a dingo and if she could flap her ears I swear she could take flight. She's around 45 pounds and is basically full grown (not very huge, which is odd considering the breeds she's mixed with...she must have been the runt). She's about a year old and she is the sweetest, gentlest dog I've ever met. She loves to play but when it's time to sleep, it's time to sleep. She's the best apartment dog on earth. Sammy and Monkey love her. Monkey was quite skeptical for the first few days but he's now understanding Lyra is about as much of a threat as a sweet potato. Sammy loves her and especially loves stalking her tail. She's also met Jeff's dog, Roland, and they quickly became best friends.

She's still figuring out what life is like outside the apartment (she had accidents at Jeff's place last weekend) but I'm sure the more stability and routine she has, the better she'll get. It's clear to me, and the people from whom I adopted her, that she was pretty severely abused as a pup. She was also quite malnourished but she's rapidly puttingon some good weight and seems to feel really good. We'll start some training in the next week, which I know will help with her confidence and trust issues. She's extremely affectionate and just wants to be loved!!

I can't wait for my family to meet her, she's a wonderful dog and after we do some more training, she's going to be a great addition to our huge clan! It's a bummer she can't come to vacation, I know she'd have a fabulous time, but such is the way of the world. She was a birthday present, and one of the best I've ever had! (don't worry, she wasn't a surprise, I would never bring a pet into my household without lots of preparation before bringing her home).

Other than this, things are about the same. Work is work, kids are awesome and weird and I just last week signed another year lease where I'm living. I realized this is the longest I've stayed in one apartment in about 6 or 7 years. Roots? Not quite, but it's better than renting a truck. :)

The summer challenge

For our summer reading program, we have asked kids from grades K-5 to "tell the librarian a joke." Once they do this, they are one step closer to receiving one of the first prizes of their summer reading log. As I'm sure you can imagine, we have had quite a few that are...ahem...interesting.

Of course we've had the standards such as "what is black and white and red all over?" With answers such as a newspaper, a nun falling down a hill, a penguin after a fistfight, that sort of thing. We've also had the occasional long, drawn-out, made-up story that isn't actually a joke, but the kid thinks is absolutely hilarious.

Here are a few good examples:

What did one eye say to the other?
Between us, something smells.

If an American is an American in the living room, what are they in the bathroom?
European!

What's yellow, rubber, and holds up banks?
A robber duckie

And then there are the knock-knocks. I don't know at what age you develop humor, but clearly some of these kids have a ways to go:

Kid: Knock knock.
Librarian: Who's there?
Kid: Monkey.
Librarian: Monkey who?
Kid: [pause] Monkey banana.
Librarian: [vocally] Ha ha! [inside] ?

Kid: Knock knock.
Librarian: Who's there?
Kid: Elephant.
Librarian: Elephant who?
Kid: Elephant Australia.
Mother of kid: It's her own joke.
Librarian: Oh, I see. Well that's great!

I was lucky enough to hear this one myself:

Kid: Knock knock.
Me: Who's there?
Kid: Banana head.
Me: Banana head who?
Kid: Garbage.
Me: Ha ha! [on the inside: ...really?]

Of course we always give a big geniune laugh because often times these kids really think the jokes are absolutely hilarious. I remember it well from my own experience. My family might remember the joke I was so proud of as a kid. The one involving a bowl of oatmeal. Anyone with me?

Overheard at the library

Today I heard a kid yell this across the library:

"MOM! HOW DO I GET TO WWWWWW.COM???"

I swear to you he had that many w's.

Another good conversation

An adorable 3-year-old girl comes to the desk.

Me: Do you have any questions today?

Her: Um..I have lots of questions.

Me: Would you like to ask them?

Her: Yes...............when I was a baby I was one year old. And when I was two I was two years old.

Me: Aaahhh...and how old are you now?

Her: I'm still three. But I'm almost four.

Me: Oh yeah? Do you know when your birthday is?

Her: July.

Me: Excellent! Me too! Do you know the day/number/date?

Her: Umm...well...I'm not having a real birthday with candles.

I have no idea what that meant except she didn't really know her birthday. I just love these kids!

My New Favorite Book

"Animals should definitely not wear clothing" by Judi Barrett, illustrated by Ron Barrett

It's just a fact, people. Animals + clothing = not awesome.

And so it begins

Summer and switfly approaching...okay, summer is HERE! I can't help but laugh whenever someone says "well you'll be getting a nice break during the summer, right?" Um...not so much. Schools have already started letting out and the library has been quite busy today. We are air conditioned and if the heat keeps up the way it has been so far, we will continue to be a cool haven for all the warm bodies!

Luckily we have some incredible things happening this summer; programs we are putting on as well as special performers we are bringing in from the outside. It's going to be an incredible summer! PLUS it's going to go by so quick. Even though it's going to be wonderful, I can't help but feel a pang of jealousy when I hear friends making their summer vacation plans. Sure, I do have a few fun things planned but nothing major until August. Boo. At the same time, it'll be here before I know it.

I'm thinking of something witty and creative to say but nothing's coming to mind. That's all I've got for now.

Not much

I don't have too much to report but I feel like I should post something. It's been a while. The kitties are still the same. Ornery, furry and fun. Sammy's still in the sink. Well, on and off, but more on than off these days. He's very happy about his discovery, so far as I can tell. What a goofball.

Work is somewhat slow right now. However, this is very much the calm before the storm. Summer reading is gearing up slowly but surely. It always makes me chuckle when someone says "well I guess with summer coming up you'll have a nice break!" Umm...no. I'm not a teacher. Summer is the busiest time of my life which actually says a lot considering how busy the library almost always is. However, as I said before, May has been a relatively slow month. Program numbers are down and I think it's mostly because suddenly it's nice outside so people want to be out there enjoying it. I don't blame them. If I could, I'd be out there with them.

I did have one great conversation with a girl about 5 years old today. She came up to the desk and here's what transpired:

Girl: Can I have a sticker?

Me: Well sweetie I don't have a sticker to give you, but here's a bookmark with monkeys on it! [I hand her the bookmark]

Girl: [walks away, pauses, returns to the desk] But this doesn't have a sticker.

Me: I know, I wish I had a sticker to give you, I'm so sorry! Would you like another bookmark?

Girl: [picks up about 150 bookmarks...yells across the library] MOM! HERE! BOOKMARKS YOU HAVE!! HERE! MOOOOMM!!!

Me: [Hesitating..] Umm, I'm not sure if mom will be too happy with all those bookmarks, why don't you take one of each?

Mom: Sweetie, we can't take all those, we have to leave some for other people. [puts giant stack back on desk, walks away]

Girl: [walks away, pauses, returns] Do you have any monies?

Me: [Laughing] No sweetie, I'm sorry I don't. Is there anything else I can help you find?

Girl: [walks away, starts to talk to our stuffed Winnie-the-Pooh toy]

Awesome!

Sinkcat is not pleased

This is my weird cat, Sammy. Sammy used to love laying in the sink...but he was about 10 pounds lighter. Now he's not so small, but nevertheless, here he is, in all his furry glory.

Of course he always does this right when I need to brush my teeth. It's ALWAYS fun figuring out new ways to get him out of the sink!

I'm not sure...

But I *think* I just overheard a kid say,

"...more crap to read."

Delightful.

It's not *just* Cinco de Mayo!

It's *also* Free Comic Book Day! FCBD is an annual event promoting comic books and graphic novels all across the country. We were lucky enough to have comic books donated from Comic Book World, a local comic book shop with some of the greatest store owners ever!

Another day, another cutie

Here's a good one. I'm walking up the stairs and I run into an old friend I haven't seen in a while. He's about 8 years old and a super goofball...we're kindred spirits. His mom and sister opt to take the elevator but he says "I'm going to walk up the stairs with you." Here's how the conversation went:

Him: "I'm going to walk up the stairs with you. Do you know why I'm going to walk up the stairs with you? It's because you're my favorite person in this library."

Me: "Oh my goodness that is just so nice. I always look forward to seeing you too!"

Him: "Do you know why you're my favorite person in this library? It's because you have blond hair!"

Me: [thinking: Um...I don't really have blond hair, kid] "Oh, that's great! You have blond hair too!"

Him: "AND because I always like your shirts."

Me: [thinking: Um...] "Well that is just so nice, thank you for the compliment!"

Him: [suddenly walks away...probably saw something shiny]

I LOVE my job!

Mah girlz

Three hot librarians out on the town!

Ego boost

Today I overheard a boy tell his mom about his favorite librarian Sally. Yay! I'm his favorite because I helped him find a Batman book.

Awesome.

Weekend

This weekend, I went to visit the Indy crew for a little familial distraction. It definitely served its purpose (thanks for letting me come over guys!) and I left with some great moments.

Upon seeing my jeans (which have holes in them), Lucy stated, "Sassy's pants broken!"

Later, we decided it was time to do some reading. Lucy went straight to Mommy and Daddy's novels and picked out "Jude the Obscure" and "Jane Eyre." After "reading" each of these, she continued to pick up every single novel on the shelf, look at it, exclaim, "oh so cute!" and throw it at me. :)

Gross 2

Monkey threw up...on my piano.


Seriously? Come ON!

Some kids should know better...

But I know they don't.

A kid about 11 or 12 years old was trying to get my attention. His comment, dripping with sarcasm and disdain went a little like this,

"Psst. Psst. Hey. PSST! Hey lady!"

I recognize his need for help.

"Hey library lady. I mean SALLY." (he said my name very loudly and slowly once he saw my nametag.)

It was fine, kids are kids are kids. Just some days are better than others to get on my wrong side. Grr.

Yumyum 2007

Ready for a morning stroll!

Mama Kaye considers jumping in for a swim.

Beautiful grounds!

A few more join the stroll.

Yumyum 2007

Can you believe it? We stayed in this mansion!

Not far away were the pretty horses. Aunt Kim was grateful the fence was NOT electric.

A nice stroll down the lane...

I am Sir Lawrence the lobster. I pinch!

Pick it up, I dare you!

Yumyum 2007

Um...Mama Kaye, are you SURE it's not going to rain??

Chillin' with the peanuts.

Group shot!

Two tired babies...good thing only one has to drive home!

Aerial view of the gorgeous living room.

A compendium of cute

Lucy took this one of Mama!

Gross

While at the library today, I watched a toddler walk around the library, bend over, spit on the floor and rub it in with his sneakers. ...multiple times.

Maybe he was cleaning. Gross.

Ah kids

At work, I have started to incorporate more and more music into my programming. One of my favorite things to do is a program with a co-worker of mine called "Family Sing Along." Everyone I work with insists on calling it "Sing Along With Sally" but I have resisted this name. ...but I have to admit...it's kind of growing on me.

Anyway, one of our regular songs in this program is "Throw it Out the Window" from Wee Sing Silly Songs. I grew up with this song and it is hilarious. Essentially, you take regular nursery rhymes and in the middle of the song, "throw it out the window." For example,

Mary had a little lamb its fleece was white as snow,
And everywhere that Mary went...
She threw it out the window, the window, the second story window,
Everywhere that Mary went she threw it out the window.

It's really funny! We always ask the audience to contribute some nursery rhymes to try and stump us (not all nursery rhymes fit this rhythm and it can get really tricky). The last time we had this program, we had around 70 people show up so when it came to audience participation, it got very funny. When we asked for nursery rhymes from the kids, apparantely we had an audience full of kids who didn't know any nursery rhymes. For example, one girl kept yelling out Christmas carols. Um...Frosty the Snowman isn't exactly a nursery rhyme. We, of course, didn't say anything and ended up using "Humpty Dumpty" and others.

I suppose it's both a mixture of silly and kind of sad. Nursery rhymes are so wonderful and they're such a great learning tool and it's unfortunate that a lot of kids just don't know any. But then again, maybe she just really wanted to sing "Frosty the Snowman." Can't say I blame her. I love Christmas carols myself.

Beautiful nieces

Please excuse the quality of the following pictures. I don't yet have a digital camera so the pictures are burnt on a CD and leave something to be desired. They don't even begin to capture the beauty in Lucy and Lainey, but at this point they'll do until I can get a digital camera.

OLD pics of Dex and Jax!

These are from just about a year ago. They've grown so much! This was the weekend I was *just* beginning to tell them apart, but I can't in these pictures. At this point, I feel somewhat confident. But either way, they're both gorgeous little boys!!

Mah Boyz

a good one

A good buddy of mine (an 11-year-old frequenter of the regular "Yu-Gi-Oh" monthly program) had to call his mom from my phone at work. He had to call back several times because his older sister kept hanging up on him over and over again. I heard him say multiple times, "put mom on the phone. Put mom on the phone. PUT MOM ON THE PHONE...AAAH. She hung up again."

When she finally heard what he was saying, he said, "GOOD." And hung up the phone. He turned to me and in the most maniacle voice he could muster he said, "I hung up on her. I hung up on her to get revenge! Aaah revenge. Revenge is sweet. But it's also kind of spicy." He's a real character.

Another major landmark

Today marks a big day in my adult life. I received six, yes six boxes of Girl Scout Cookies. In the past, I have mooched off other's cookies. This year, I decided to pony up the dough and get some of my own.

What did I have for dinner tonight? Tagalongs, Dosidos and my favorite, Samoas. And yes, I do feel quite ill now. (MK, I hear you fussing). :)

On another note, my Sammy-boy has pimples on his chin. Feline acne. Have I posted this before? Sorry if it's a repeat. And sorry for not being on top of this, it's been a crazy CRAZY month! Soon I should have some awesome pics to post so stay tuned.

Woo woo!

Yay Colts! What a great game! Sorry to all the Bears fans out there.

A nomination

I nominate today (Tuesday, January 23) as one of the top 25 worst Tuesdays ever. Can I get a second? Or a witness, or whatever it takes?

It's been frustrating for me because of several things, most of which I won't go into to protect the innocent, but one of the worst things has been the klutz factor. I don't know what it is. I've been dropping everything, knocking things over, bumping into things, and everything in between.

I wish I had some good stories from the library but mostly it's been pretty normal. However, I did draw a pretty awesome picture of the Cheshire Cat. I think I am about 3% Cheshire Cat. Something about him really appeals to me on several levels.

What Sassy is made of:

• 75% Water


• 12% Useless knowledge (like channel 27 used to be Nickelodeon...that's taking up space that could be used for some more useful information)


• 7% Bubbles and frou-frou


• 3% Cheshire cat (or Eeyore, depending on the day)


• 2% Sweet potato


• 1% _____________________ (I haven't figured this part out yet)

You wouldn't believe how many times I had to use the computer's calculator to figure that out.

I got glasses!

Well finally, after a lot of hemming and hawing I got my eyes checked. They're not terrible, the glasses are more for reading and computer work but I'm finding I'm doing less squinting. I think they are very librarian-ish and cute! :) Please pardon the goofy expression, I just couldn't resist.

First excellent conversation of 2007

A 6 or 7-year-old boy walks up to the desk with his mom and mom's friend.

Him: Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.

Me: Hi!

Him: Guess what!

Me: What?!

Him: [slightly shocked with a hint of sad] I lost my superpowers.

Me: Oh no! Where did you lose them?

Him: Well, I dropped them under my bed and I can't reach them. You have to be big to get your superpowers back!

Me: Oh, don't worry, you'll find them. [whispering] I did.

Him: ...But I have Spider-man shoes on!

You just can't beat that logic.

First post of 2007

I wrote an email to myself yesterday regarding what I wanted to post today. Lots of updates, lots of stuff going on, lots of fun exchanges with children...I might have to break this up into a few posts.

First off, my furry smelly boys. Monkey is doing much better. He had a bad urinary tract infection and had to be taken to the emergency vet. He was put on antibiotics. I tried to wrap him up in a towel to make a little Monkey burrito and force it down his throat but it's amazing how a 14-pound quadraped can outmanuever and eventually win in a battle with a 26-year-old 100-some-odd pound woman. So I had to crush up the pills and put them on some wet food. All in all, he's doing 100% better and back to his old rascally self.

Sammy has issues too. He has chin acne. Yes, that's what I said. He has zits on his little kitty chin. When I took him into the vet just to make sure it was okay, the vet said that his hair follicles are infected so he has to be put on antibiotics. And guess what! It's that bubble gum amoxycillin that we all used to take! How weird! He doesn't resist as much when I wrap him up in a little Sammy burrito and force the pink liquid down his throat. In fact, he purrs rather loudly. Ha! Once the infection clears up, I'm supposed to rub this gel into his chin to help clear up the acne. Oh yeah, and it runs the risk of bleaching everything I own if I don't rub it in well. *insert sarcastic "awesome" here* He's doing okay overall though. I think he's kind of mad though because the acne won't clear up in time for the big dance. ...ha!

Let's see...what else. Oh, I've discovered my own rating for books. I noticed recently that if I feel the overwhelming need to hug a book as soon as I finish it, it is a lifelong love for me. This goes for all types of books: picture books, children's chapter books, teen fiction and adult fiction. I'm working on my so-far list of all-time favorite books including those with huggability. I'll post that someday.

And finally: my new year's resolution. I am going to try to actually write thank you cards. To all of you who read this to whom I owe a thank you card, please know I truly am thankful for all that is given to me, I'm just...well...bad at that. I'm gonna keep tryin!